Go For The Goldfish
by Tiggy of the Wind
Summary: Warning! this story as of yet doesn't seem to have a plot! Read at your on risk!
1. Default Chapter

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Disclaimer- I do not own Jareth, Sarah, Toby, Hoggle, Sir Didymus, and anyone else who might just pop up in this fic. They all belong to such people as *dun dun dun* George Lucas and Jim Henson.and other pepsI don't really know because I'm writing this on the spur of the moment and don't really know who I am going to bring in. Like I was saying before I don't own any of those people. The only thing in this fic that I own is myself, Kana, lucky me huh. And I would like to thank*thinks for about ten minutesOH YEAH!!* Unicorn Lady and Melissa Davis for their help withyou'll see *MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. hahahahahahahahahahaha....hahahahahaha..haha...hahaha..hahaaa...oh its not that funny* Why are you still reading thisGET ON TO THE STORY!!! Oh and if you are still reading this, could anyone in the little review box thing *you know what Im talking about* give me the full definition and qualifications it takes to be a listian, cause I really don't think that Jareth wants an unqualified listian on his hands. *giggles evily*

Jareth was sitting on his thrown thinking up ways to capture his one *coughyeahrightcough* true loveSARAH DUH!! *But thank you for thinking thator not thinking thatstop it you perverts* 

what to do, what to do Jareth asked one of his smarter goblins *are there any?* The *ahem* smarter goblin thought about this for a few minutes then came up with his answer. 

Why dont you kiddnap her parents and make her go through the labyrinth for them? Well that is what it was supposed to come out as it came out as more of a -y don u id'ap er erants n' lake er o troug e abyint or em- because he was eating somethingwhich I won't go throught the trouble of identifyingcall me lazybut am I really that lazy, cause I am going through all the trouble of typing all these extra words outoh well drop the subjectDROP IT!!

No, that is so unoriginalits all been done beforeher parents, her brother AGAIN, her best friend, and NONE of those people worked I tried all of themthanks to the wonderful help of my listians *grimances* *to listians* THANK YOU SO MUCH! *back to story* I want to try something that hasnt been used before. I want*POOF!!*WHAT THE!! WHO ARE YOU!! he addressed to the blond teenager that was sprawled on the floor in front of him.

Who am I! I am Kana one of Dilandau-samas loyal DragonSlayers. I am also the Dillymon Empress co-ruler of the Dillymon world. And I am also Kana ruler of the Zaibach empire. I am also Gui-Gon Jinn's co-pad wan along with Obi-Wan Kenobi *the young young Kenobias in 15ish* I am also *scans Jareth up and down* looking for workgot any? I could maybe do your make-up for you, or maybe your hair, or even*is interuppeded by Jareth*

If it is a title you are looking for, listian is the only one available. But you would not get that title immediately, you will have to prove yourself first. Are you up to the challenge Jareth cocked an eyebrow and smirked at the girl.

How dare you smirk at me! I am an Empress, I have my own country! Who are you to smirk at me!

I am the King of the Goblins Jareth said menacingly. Kana looked at him like he was crazy.

Sure you are *Kana patted him gently on the shoulder while looking around the room for a way out. She spotted a window and began to slowly inch toward it. Sencsing Kana disbeiliefor maybe it was the fact that she looked as if she was going to jump out the windowshe was.

Hey! Get away from that window! Jareth tried to grab Kana's arm without her noticing, but failed miserably when she noticed.

Get away from me you crazy blond! Kana dived for the window just as Jareth dived for her. Jareth caught her right as she passed through the windowby the hair. *okay everyone update time, this is what is going on incase you are confusedyou probably are, well this is it. Kana is hanging out of one of the castles windows and Jareth is holding her by the hair so she wont fallfun huh*

Do you have a death wish or something! Jareth still managed to sound bored out of his mind while preventing a girl he had just met from falling to her death. After a few minutes of pondering she replied.

what do I need to do for that job, I dont think you ever mentioned it. Kana replied sounding as bored as Jareth.

Oh, nothing much. All you have to do is figure out a way for me to trick my one true love into the labyrinth so she will stay here with me forever. And you cant have me kidnap her parents, friends, brother, or anyone else like that.

Hmm, that's tough. Tell me, does this Sarah have any pets? Kana pondered over the current situationand yes she is still hanging out the window.

Yes she does Jareth told Kana.

If I remember correctly she has a dog named Merlin, and a goldfish named Goldie Jareth told Kana after thinking for a few minutes. *hey, he is a blond!*

Why dont we kidnap one of them, which one do you think has the most influence on her life? Kana asked Jareth smirking at what she thought his answer would beshe wasn't disappointed.

I say we go for Goldie. Jareth replied immediately.

Why the fish?

The fish because its shiny *insane giggle* and its shiny! And did I mention SHINY!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHA!!!!!!!! Jareth laughed insanely for about half an hour. After he had calmed down Kana deemed it safe to ask him a question.

So this fish, its shiny?

How shiny?

It glitters like a Crystaaaaaaallllllllllll Mooooooooooooooooooonnnnn!!!!!! Jareth burst into song.

Okay, I get it, its shiny. But I say we go for the dog. *Jareth glared at her* Okay, okay, well get the fish! Kana crossed her arms and pouted. But just to inform you, you cant blame me if this thing fails

Oh yes I can! As a listian-in-training you have to make sure that everything works out. Jareth said pointedly. 

Fine, Ill do my best *insane laughterthink Dilandau from Escaflowne, or the Digimon Emperor from Digimon Digital Monstersyou get the ideabut Dilly would be the best available example because he has that exact line in one of the episodes.*

Will Kana do her best and be promoted to listian or will Jareth's plan make them both end up in the dog house? prabably. Will Jareth ever actualy listen to Kana who appears to be very experienced in the ruling department?...prabably not? Will Kana loose her job as listian-in-training?...most likely yes. Do you want this story to continue?...most likely no. And for my favorite quote from a movie where I got the idea for the name for Sarah's fish. By the way I don't own the movie I got this quote from, if you tell me the name of the movie you will get mentioned in the next chapter of my fic...and maybe I will even read and review one of your fics. Here it is-

"My dog Pogo?"

"Ran over by the carriage"

"My goldfish Goldie?"

"Eaten by the cat"

"My cat?"

"Choked on the goldfish"

To easy? Well here is another one *and I don't own this movie either*-

"Cats rule"

Another easy one but they will get harder as time goes by. Remember what you are supposed to do.


	2. Hair care

Untitled Normal Page 

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Disclaimer- I do not own Labyrinth. I do not know who owns Labyrinth...prabably Gerge Lucas scince Jim Henson passed away. For all I know disney owns it. *bad thoughts bad thoughts* Its not that I am dissing Disney, far from, I love the company. This is what I'm thinking...what would Jareth look like in either animation, or whatever clothes disney would put him in. Or even the musical numbers...*To the song we are the Titans from Remember The Titans...if you haven't seen it, see it!* 

Everywhere I go

People wanna know 

Who I am 

I am Jareth,

Mighty mighty Jareth *does that cute little slide thing*

*you get the idea...actually I couldn't remember any more of the song*

Now on to the fun stuff,

The answers to the quotes are, Robin Hood Men in Tights, and the answer to the second one is, Cats and Dogs. 

For Robin Hood Men in Tights the winners are-

dawn

jarethluva4lyf

Claire Starling

Jenn

Emmy-chan

For Cats and Dogs the winners are-

jarethluva4lyf

Claire Starling

Demonica

And Unicorn Lady, don't worry I already got Jareth to reasure me that nothing will happen to either you or Mel...in case he does do something he has to fight my Fairy Folken Mother *FFM* until one of them loses all their glitter. MWAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Now on to the story!!

Jareth finally pulled Kana back into the castle once they were done plotting how to kidnap Sarah's fish. And please note that because they are both blonds this took quite awhile...and if anyone asks how our brave listian-in-training's hair could stand all of this torture...none of us really know. So Jareth decided to ask her.

"How was your hair able to stand doing that?" Jareth asked Kana.

"Stand doing what? Staying out in the sun, or being hung out of the window?" 

"Staying out in the sun. Just look at my hair, look at it! No matter what I try with it, I get out into that blazing orange *is it orange* sun and POOF! it frizzes then goes all limp...and all it takes is about three minutes! How can I rule this place if I can't go out of the castle! What did you do to keep your hair from frizzing?! You were out there for like an hour!" Jareth went on like this fretting around the room. *think teenage girl complaining about her hair...or not*

"I shampooed my hair this morning, but I don't see how that would be special. Maybe its different depending on what gender you are." Kana said after thinking *she is doing a lot of that lately ain't she*

"Why don't we test it"

"Okay, I have a test subject in mind."

"Who?"

"His name is Matt, and he is a bud. And according to our band teacher *who all love and admire...coughyeahrightcough* Matt has great hair."

"Alright, Mat then" Jareth pulled out one of his balls...I mean crystals *BAD THOUGHTS!* And turned it in his hand *VIRGIN EYES!* and then it dissapeared. *POOF!* 

"Hi Matt." Kana waved as she looked at him and waved.

"Where am I?"

"You are in his castle" Kana pointed at Jareth.

"Oh...right..." Suddenly Matt ran toward Jareth picked him up and threw him out the window Kana, just a few hour ago, had been hanging out of.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" Jareth screamed as he flew through the sky with the greatest of ease the daring young man on the flying trapeze. *sorry went into song mode there*

"What did you just do to my possible employer!" Kana screamed at Matt as she watched Jareth fall toward the labyrinth.

"I over threw him" Matt replied calmly as he watched Jareth make an unkingly plop on his but on the hill where Sarah had first started her journey. *wow some through...I didn't know Matt had it in him!*

"Explain yourself!"

"Well I only ment to through him onto that house." Matt pointed at one of the nearby goblin houses. "But, he went over it. So I overthrew him. And now the kingdom is MINE BLAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!"

*meanwhile out by the pond where we first met Hoggle*

Hoggle: "Oh look *pointing upwards* an Aster-"

*POW! Hoggle is hit by Jareth*

*from underneath Jareth*

"Oid"

What will happen to Jareth, Matt, and Kana. Well Jareth will have a Hoggle sized imprint on his butt. Matt will, most likely, sit in Jareth's chair. Kana will get a pay cut...wait!...she wasn't paid in the first place! So who knows what happens to her.

Now for the part you actually clicked to see this for...the movie quotes!!

This first one...if you ask me is a toufy so give it your best shot *I do not own the movie*-

I'm gonna go to my room now and cry.

Now for another quote. Now I haven't actually seen the movie...but I am almost positive it is said in the movie. Because it was said in the series all the time. *I do not own the movie or the series*

MMMMMOOOOOORRRRRRRREEEEEEEOOOOOOO!!!!!

And the last one is going to be a bit easier *disclaimer I don't own this movie either*-

We dance, we kiss, we smooch, we carry on, we go home happy, what do ya say?

*I think that is how it goes, well if it isn't right here is another one from the same movie* 

"What is that name again?!"

Sorry if those are tough. May the shwartx be with you. And I'll try to get the next chapter a little longer.


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